frunk_the_stick

Jobs

2009-03-02T16:05:04Z

So, I don’t lives above Muffingrinders no more, not since that Rassimel Monster-Licker got the watch to chase me out. I lives in another attic now, down by the tanners. Lots of empty places there, and the place was all empty-like, so in I moves. I lives in the attic.

I gots to inkling it could be used fer commerce, which is to say, jobs. I done jobs before, such jobs as Primes gives to Khtsoyis.

I gotta sign in the window what says “No Questions.” An Orren drawed it for me. I can letter, and read what I letters, but I can’t make letters so neat. He also added some stuff under it, letters what he said would get me more of the business.

This is what them letters are.

NO QUESTIONS
F.T. Stick, proprietor
Willing to undertake such jobs as are needful
DISCRETION GUARANTEED
_{Truncheonwork and Observation our Specialties}

I gotta desk, too. And marbles, fer something to do.

The other primes are dirty liars and they make a lot of noise

2007-08-30T14:28:41Z

My name is Frunk and I lives in ~~Veshrain~~ ~~Vashrame~~ some city that's fulla Orren and stuff. Not so many Khtsoyis and sometimes maybe I think we need a city of our own.

There's a magic school here that I like to float around 'an eat tilenuts and drop them on the baby wizards. They gotta Zie Rie, even.

I live under a roof in the attic of Muffingrinders. Don't need stairs or nothing. Just a window. The store has a stupid name and the owner is a damn sloggie if I ever smelled one, and Khtsoyis don't smell so good.

I mean, we can't smell things so good.

I hear things sometimes about Khtsoyis from the scrawn-raping stupid kids in the store when they walk out with their pukey furry porn and scary bug porn. They can't hear or spot me cause I'm blue like the sky, or black like the roof, and I just sorta float under the roof. They say lies!

1. Khtsoyis are boozers.
Yah, Primes who say that just can't hold their own. And we invented it first, so what? Khtsoyis can't get buzzy from leaf tea so good, and your stupid Orren or Rassimel or Cani food tastes like dirt, so give us slack.

2. Khtsoyis smell terrible.
Yeah, I cop to this. My nose ain't so good. This one time? I had three dead rats in a rotten sack of apples ~~as my pillow~~ somewhere in my room for weeks and didn't know till a Rassimel complained. I hit him with a stick, but then I throwed out the rats.

3. Khtsoyis are violent.
Gorromor are violent. Sleeth are violent. Khtsoyis ain't so violent. We just get mad pretty easy, okay? And hungry. And, yeah, we drinks a lot, so maybe that makes us mad, too.

4. Khtsoyis are often criminal.
This one makes me wanna spit from my other mouth. Maybe you want us to starve? Khtsoyis need feedin', and drinks, and stuff, and no one gives us jobs 'cept for Primes who need things beaten or took. So who is a bigger crook? The stick-thumper sloggie, or the Cani who hired him?

What are you lookin' at?

2007-02-21T18:52:50Z

This one time, I dropped a Rassimel punk right offa branch.

Right offa branch. Hur hurr.